Park Under The Chicken

When we were in the mountains a couple of weeks ago one of our goals was to stop at a place the husband had been to a while back. He wanted me to see the place.

So this place was so ridiculous and fun. She's a local artist who essentially makes yard art, but man it's just yard art of the highest order.

For someone who has no interest in yard work at all, I have to admit that I suddenly want to landscape and have all the yard art ever. This is just adorable. I want to be THAT neighbor. I want to have weird, unnecessary things in my hard.

The kids loved the really giant things, like the dragon and the king kong. Hey look there's my shadow! I'm giant too!
Do you think my neighbors would care if I buried a car in my yard for art?

What if it was cute? They probably would. Also I wouldn't tend the shrubs so it would look all life after people shortly. So no to that I suppose.

I have so many decorating aspirations and I swear this life sucks them all out of me. THIS IS SO CUTE. I want a little camper and to decorate it. I'm sick today so all I can do is imagine what it would be like to have such energy to decorate things and stuff.
When it was all said and done, we decided we are going to be THOSE neighbors and I got two pieces of yard art and sorry not sorry.

The pig is a real working weathervane.
Yes, I need to work on my flower garden, I know.

I have this GREAT IDEA for flowerbed edging...but it sounds like a lot of work so you know, haven't done it. But it would be SO CUTE.

Some day.

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Park Under The Chicken

When we were in the mountains a couple of weeks ago one of our goals was to stop at a place the husband had been to a while back. He wanted me to see the place.

So this place was so ridiculous and fun. She's a local artist who essentially makes yard art, but man it's just yard art of the highest order.

For someone who has no interest in yard work at all, I have to admit that I suddenly want to landscape and have all the yard art ever. This is just adorable. I want to be THAT neighbor. I want to have weird, unnecessary things in my hard.

The kids loved the really giant things, like the dragon and the king kong. Hey look there's my shadow! I'm giant too!
Do you think my neighbors would care if I buried a car in my yard for art?

What if it was cute? They probably would. Also I wouldn't tend the shrubs so it would look all life after people shortly. So no to that I suppose.

I have so many decorating aspirations and I swear this life sucks them all out of me. THIS IS SO CUTE. I want a little camper and to decorate it. I'm sick today so all I can do is imagine what it would be like to have such energy to decorate things and stuff.
When it was all said and done, we decided we are going to be THOSE neighbors and I got two pieces of yard art and sorry not sorry.

The pig is a real working weathervane.
Yes, I need to work on my flower garden, I know.

I have this GREAT IDEA for flowerbed edging...but it sounds like a lot of work so you know, haven't done it. But it would be SO CUTE.

Some day.

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Desert Rose

I guess it was the total disrepair at the Fernbank Gardens that made me decide I should abdicate my title as hillbilly neighbor of the garden world. I have to confess, I HATE GARDENING. I don't find it fulfilling. I don't find it rewarding. I don't get a great sense of peace by creating a lovely garden. I have no great need to work with my hands in the earth.

I just want it to magically look nice all on it's own.

Funny how that doesn't actually work out at all.

When I moved in, the woman who owned the house before me cut the roses by the front steps down into near oblivion. I am guessing she took them with her. I have no green thumb and all I know about roses is what my grandmother taught me - drop coffee grounds and banana peels at their feet and leave them alone. I've done this. I learned from Kirk at work that when I get black spot to pour a beer at their feet and the earth around them - this works, I do this. But there is probably a weeding and pruning part of this that I've been uninvolved in.

Proof.

So yeah, there's a rose plant in this mess. My children came outside for popsicles and I set to work taking out anything that wasn't roses. This was tricky and I've realized that there is something very big with a very thick base growing up that I'm going to have to use some Roundup or something to kill properly as it's growing from under the porch.

I pretty much had everything not roses cleared by this time as you can see. And WOW that looks like crap. I didn't document my next step but I pulled out all the rose branches that were dead, much to my surprise that was most of them, they were brittle and just came away instantly. Who knew? I cut everything down, but now I'm thinking maybe I should cut it down more, I don't even know.

You can see that big ass thick whatever TREE thing growing out from under my porch too. I WILL find the chemical to kill you with. I can't cut it, it'll just keep growing.

So now I'm wondering, should I plant a second rose plant next to this? This looks like hell. This is a small space of yuck. Two rose plants? A trellis? They aren't really climbing roses. Or are they and I don't understand roses? UGH I don't know.  All I know if that I gave them some banana peels and some coffee grounds and it rained like hell so I hope they show me some life.

In my work, I had to get down on the ground and got an unfortunate look under my porch.

I found a dead millipede (centipede?) and a gift left behind by our snake neighbor. I haven't seen her in weeks but the fact that she left her skin is an unfortunate reminder that she's now bigger as she was big as hell when I last saw her. I guess now I know where all the bunnies went. Well, I guess the coyotes might have eaten them. Hard to say.

Circle of life.

Now, I have to sort out this gardening shit. Ugh. I wish I was domestic sometimes.
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Desert Rose

I guess it was the total disrepair at the Fernbank Gardens that made me decide I should abdicate my title as hillbilly neighbor of the garden world. I have to confess, I HATE GARDENING. I don't find it fulfilling. I don't find it rewarding. I don't get a great sense of peace by creating a lovely garden. I have no great need to work with my hands in the earth.

I just want it to magically look nice all on it's own.

Funny how that doesn't actually work out at all.

When I moved in, the woman who owned the house before me cut the roses by the front steps down into near oblivion. I am guessing she took them with her. I have no green thumb and all I know about roses is what my grandmother taught me - drop coffee grounds and banana peels at their feet and leave them alone. I've done this. I learned from Kirk at work that when I get black spot to pour a beer at their feet and the earth around them - this works, I do this. But there is probably a weeding and pruning part of this that I've been uninvolved in.

Proof.

So yeah, there's a rose plant in this mess. My children came outside for popsicles and I set to work taking out anything that wasn't roses. This was tricky and I've realized that there is something very big with a very thick base growing up that I'm going to have to use some Roundup or something to kill properly as it's growing from under the porch.

I pretty much had everything not roses cleared by this time as you can see. And WOW that looks like crap. I didn't document my next step but I pulled out all the rose branches that were dead, much to my surprise that was most of them, they were brittle and just came away instantly. Who knew? I cut everything down, but now I'm thinking maybe I should cut it down more, I don't even know.

You can see that big ass thick whatever TREE thing growing out from under my porch too. I WILL find the chemical to kill you with. I can't cut it, it'll just keep growing.

So now I'm wondering, should I plant a second rose plant next to this? This looks like hell. This is a small space of yuck. Two rose plants? A trellis? They aren't really climbing roses. Or are they and I don't understand roses? UGH I don't know.  All I know if that I gave them some banana peels and some coffee grounds and it rained like hell so I hope they show me some life.

In my work, I had to get down on the ground and got an unfortunate look under my porch.

I found a dead millipede (centipede?) and a gift left behind by our snake neighbor. I haven't seen her in weeks but the fact that she left her skin is an unfortunate reminder that she's now bigger as she was big as hell when I last saw her. I guess now I know where all the bunnies went. Well, I guess the coyotes might have eaten them. Hard to say.

Circle of life.

Now, I have to sort out this gardening shit. Ugh. I wish I was domestic sometimes.
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Pumpkin Update

So while I was laid up in the bed, the boy and his Dad planted the pumpkins. My poor husband had to dig up the hard Georgia clay with a spade because we don't have a rototiller.

Despite his usual dislike of bugginess, the big boy had a pretty good time planting.

Here you see the careful placement of one of our beloved pumpkins. I haven't been out to the patch since we put them in the ground, I crawled out of bed long enough to witness one of them being placed which was kind of exciting even if we're not pumpkin experts exactly.

The boy is pretty excited regardless.

I am told that we have a few remaining (we planted several that day). I haven't trekked out to our pumpkin patch to see how we're doing as of yet.

In other great farming news - remember the orange seeds we germinated at the same time?

The husband tells me we have two.

Good grief, we're farmers.

Pumpkin Update

So while I was laid up in the bed, the boy and his Dad planted the pumpkins. My poor husband had to dig up the hard Georgia clay with a spade because we don't have a rototiller.

Despite his usual dislike of bugginess, the big boy had a pretty good time planting.

Here you see the careful placement of one of our beloved pumpkins. I haven't been out to the patch since we put them in the ground, I crawled out of bed long enough to witness one of them being placed which was kind of exciting even if we're not pumpkin experts exactly.

The boy is pretty excited regardless.

I am told that we have a few remaining (we planted several that day). I haven't trekked out to our pumpkin patch to see how we're doing as of yet.

In other great farming news - remember the orange seeds we germinated at the same time?

The husband tells me we have two.

Good grief, we're farmers.

And Wouldn't You Know It....

Despite having no freaking idea what I am doing or how any of this is supposed to work.....

the 500 Pound Pumpkin Seeds have sprouted.

So Martha, is it time to plant them?

Bettah say yes, cuz I am planting them tonight.

And Wouldn't You Know It....

Despite having no freaking idea what I am doing or how any of this is supposed to work.....

the 500 Pound Pumpkin Seeds have sprouted.

So Martha, is it time to plant them?

Bettah say yes, cuz I am planting them tonight.

So The Boy Brings Home These Orange Seeds....

No lie. He had an orange for lunch and pulled the seeds out and wrapped them in a napkin and put them in his pocket. Since we have so much room, so much YARD here - he wants to plant them.

There is a part of me (the big lazy part) that goes SIGH OH GOD WHAT? But there is the Mom part that is proud of this sweet little boy with big orange tree dreams. I wonder if it reminds him of Florida?

So his dad takes him to the store to get some soil and planting cups.
I google the how to - cuz you know, I don't know HOW TO.




And they brought home big pumpkin seeds. I dunno if it's the right time of year to germinate seeds - but by golly we're doing it!

This is the part of parenting that falls under "I don't know what I'm doing." I just realized we need to water them again. I need to go right now and do so.

****TIME PASSES****

Ok I'm back. So here we are, two trays one full of pumpkin seeds that allege to grow up to 500 pounds and one tray full of orange tree seeds.

He's so enamored of the process, he wants it to work so bad. I'd wave a magic wand to make it happen if I could. But the best I could do was run downstairs mid blogpost and water them. Surprisingly they still seemed a bit moist so yay us.

I am uncertain what we are going to do with 500 pound pumpkins - however.

You DO Realize that they will grow - just to thwart me, don't you?

So The Boy Brings Home These Orange Seeds....

No lie. He had an orange for lunch and pulled the seeds out and wrapped them in a napkin and put them in his pocket. Since we have so much room, so much YARD here - he wants to plant them.

There is a part of me (the big lazy part) that goes SIGH OH GOD WHAT? But there is the Mom part that is proud of this sweet little boy with big orange tree dreams. I wonder if it reminds him of Florida?

So his dad takes him to the store to get some soil and planting cups.
I google the how to - cuz you know, I don't know HOW TO.




And they brought home big pumpkin seeds. I dunno if it's the right time of year to germinate seeds - but by golly we're doing it!

This is the part of parenting that falls under "I don't know what I'm doing." I just realized we need to water them again. I need to go right now and do so.

****TIME PASSES****

Ok I'm back. So here we are, two trays one full of pumpkin seeds that allege to grow up to 500 pounds and one tray full of orange tree seeds.

He's so enamored of the process, he wants it to work so bad. I'd wave a magic wand to make it happen if I could. But the best I could do was run downstairs mid blogpost and water them. Surprisingly they still seemed a bit moist so yay us.

I am uncertain what we are going to do with 500 pound pumpkins - however.

You DO Realize that they will grow - just to thwart me, don't you?