A Mommy Blog About Raising Men, Not Boys.

Thursday, September 03, 2009

The Facets of Infertility

Infertility is a multifaceted gemstone that none of us want. Each side has it's own problem and it's own resolution. So far I've experienced three of them.
  • Unable to get pregnant - which I thought was the worst but was wrong. That was simply frustration - WHY AM I NOT PREGNANT and the like.
  • Able to get pregnant but miscarrying each time - which we've gone through a couple of times now in the last couple of years.
  • Suddenly pregnant for no reason - which is the best side of that particular stone I'm sure you agree. I personally thought it rocked.

I guess I mistakenly thought that pregnancy in my world had two stories, it would work out or it would not. My pregnancies which worked out went off just great. My pregnancies which miscarried failed fast and early.

I wasn't aware I had turned the stone to look into another side.

Pregnancy which is fine but you body seems to not be a willing participant in.

At six weeks pregnant I have great hormone levels, a baby with a heartbeat (yes I saw it) but - I'm bleeding. Who knows why? I'm on bedrest, laying down as much as I can.

Everything is FINE, but everything is not fine.

So I don't know what is going to happen. But I am hopeful. I lay in my bed and on the sofa and I wait and I hope.

I hope it is enough.


April Brandon said...

I hope that it's enough too!!!

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

Hang in there.

I wish I had something better to say.