I knew in my heart, after last time, that they were going to call me back. I had my first mammogram a few years ago, and then I got the OH SHIT COME BACK WE NEED TO SEE YOU call. I went every six months for screenings for what turned out to be dense tissue and a cyst which went away all on it's own.
So I donned my pink gown (above) and went in for the ten minute process that was my mammogram. I grabbed a water from the fridge (they owed me the water for the indignity of the nipple stickers and the manhandling even though the lady was nice). I hurt and I was suddenly overcome with nerves.
Getting a mammogram is the "let's see if you have cancer" test. When you get your pap smear they check for cancer and my doctor at least checks on your overall female health. But the mammogram is, at least to me, cancer or not cancer? That's more than a bit nerve wracking.
I can't completely blame the mammogram and the impending call, but I woke up at 4 am in excruciating pain, with what seemed to be an ulcer. My husband sat up with me while I waited for medicine to work and I watched the Smurfs with him. Eventually he put me back to bed.
When I woke up, I had the phone call waiting for me in my voice mail. "We need to see you at the Outpatient Breast Imaging Center" ...MONDAY. Yeah yeah I know the drill. Yes I know where to park. Looking forward to your snacks and beverages.
I slept most of today, overcome with aching in my stomach and what I realize now is stress. I'll get referred back to the Boob Doctor as he's lovingly called. I shouldn't be stressed. Everything is fine. I'm sure it's fine.
I hope it's fine.