A Mommy Blog About Raising Men, Not Boys.

Monday, October 05, 2009

More Dick Moves For Jon Gosselin To Pull

Now that Jon Gosselin has drained almost all the money out of their account I have been thinking about other dick moves he could make.

I mean, I think that the money thing was out of line. He's gonna have to give that back.

But you know, using the California "HALF" rule.....I was thinking these are some things he COULD take.

  • Half the dishes. (take cups not saucers, cuz that's funny)

  • Half the sheets- top or bottom but not both

  • Half the food - bring Tupperware to dump out the bit you are taking with you Jon

  • Half the curtains - I say depending on if you are right or left handed, choose the curtains on that side and take those

  • Half the books and half the records/tapes/CDs

  • Half the Wagon Wheel Coffee Table (see when Harry Met Sally)

  • Half the kids- just take the 4 that don't sass

See it goes on and on. Just split that shit up. Like King Solomon and the baby, divide it in two and to the victors go the spoils. That works really well right? RIGHT?

In all seriousness, these are like the two sorriest people I have ever had the media keep forcing down my throat. Can't Paris Hilton do a porno film or pose naked with a snake or something?