Regarding Avocados

Ok so, let's get this part out of the way. I don't eat a lot of vegetables. Or, any of them. (Ok exaggeration). But, some of them are just so much grosser to me than the others, that I can barely even stand them.

A recent addition to this list is avocados. Not because of anything the avocados have done. They're still laying about being green with the big pit and rather innocuous.

No.

It's the gawdawful commercials.

On the radio several times a day during my ATL commute, I have to hear these nauseating commercials about avocados. Seriously, do avocados NEED better PR? That's my first question. Because people who love them seem to truly just BE MAD FOR THEM. Secondly, PLEASE MAKE LESS ANNOYING COMMERICALS.

The one with the lady pretending to have a cooking show? She's saccharine and annoying during her make believe, and then it's just sort of pitiful and embarrasssing for her when she gets caught by her kid playing make believe, please knock that one off.

But the worst one? The lady who who made chicken salad and chopped up avocados in it and brought it to work. Her boss steals her sandwich and then I SWEAR you give me like, 15-20 seconds of me LISTENING TO HIM EAT IT? I can HEAR HIS SALIVA and every chomp. It's VILE.

Literally, it's sickening. If he was sitting next to me in a  restaurant I'd have to hum loudly to get that sound out of my own head so that I could eat. Who thought this was a great idea?

You might think oh well there they are successful because they've got you thinking about avocados but I'd disagree. Because you see, they didn't convert me - which should be their goal by spending advertising money. They should be seeking out us NON-avocado consumers and making us COVET their product. Instead, I think "Why would I want an avocado? Apparently you live in fantasy land and eat like a foul pig if you eat them."

Also, I have PMS. Can you tell?
Tweet