The One Where I Confess That I'm Not A Cool Mom

There is this misconception, sometimes I find, that I am a "cool" mom.


Please make no mistake.


I am not cool.


I used to have a piercing high on my ear lobe that was given to me by a guy a met in a bar, with full sleeve tattoos and so many piercings that I don't know how he consumed liquid without it all pouring out like a cartoon character.


I met him in a bar and he offered to pierce me.


And I said ok.

But now, I wear Mom jeans, they are too blue. I'm ok with that. I was once spotted across a parking lot because my friends recognized my dark jeans and my too white shoes.

Again, I'm ok with that.

I take you to the fair for your special day, and I make sure we have the cake you want for your special day. And we ride the rides and we feast on the foods that will surely stop our hearts before their times.

But lemme 'splain one important thing.

I'm your mother. I'm not your friend and I'm not your pal. I'm here to keep you alive, safe and happy. In THAT ORDER.

So when you pout because I won't let you ride the rollercoaster that broke down with you on it, I'm not gonna budge. And when you whine about it, I'm going to remember how they wouldn't let you off......and all the visions of my little boy dying were raging through my mind.

And I'm not gonna budge.

Because I'm not cool.

I'm your Mom. And I love you way too much to be cool. I promise you that.