A Mommy Blog About Raising Men, Not Boys.

Sunday, August 21, 2005

Second Birth Story

When I learned I was pregnant with twins (at around week 12) I also learned that no one on the Earth ever gives birth to twins the old fashioned way. It's C Sections all around these day. It's too dangerous to give birth vaginally, it's too risky. You will probably end up needed a C Section anyway so why bother, etc etc. I was blessed with probably the best twin pregnancy in the history of the world. I had some awful morning sickness in the beginning, much worse than the first time but other than that, the pregnancy was really okay. As I progressed my boys were little troopers, both of them inverting to the vertex position right on cue and staying there just like little troopers should. But my doctors practice wouldn't even discuss trying a vaginal delivery. One of them even told me that "no one in this practice is willing to deliver you vaginally." I was really pissed off but at 36 weeks along, do you REALLY want to change OBs?
So one of the doctors I really like, a real no shit kind of chick, Dr B elected to do my C section and I had a consult with her. She was cool, made me feel pretty okay. She had delivered babies herself both ways and explained how this time would be different for me as far as how I felt etc etc. I expressed how I really really really wanted to try vaginal delivery, and she smiled and said "Well, if you show up to the hospital dialated to 4+ and in hard labor we can discuss it."

Never dare me, people. Never.

On Monday I had my appt at the hospital to prepare for my C Section on Thursday. I went to work after my appt (I worked up till that Monday, never missed a DAY) and let them know that I was going to HAVE to get the C section done and I had to stop working on Tuesday.

On Tuesday my Mom flew in to be here for the birth.

On Wednesday Morning, my husband and I started doing it like there was no tomorrow. Irritate the cervix people, irritate the cervix I tell you! At around 2pm I started to feel kind of crampy, kind of yucky. So I laid down for a nap. At 3pm I woke up and felt crampy again and then I just had this feeling, this THIS IS IT sort of feeling so I hopped in the shower for the ritualistic shaving of the legs and armpits. When I got out I dressed in some comfly clothes and put on a little makeup. Then I went into the living room and told my mom that maybe we better start timing these cramps I was having. That's what they felt like, cramps. Certainly NOT the worst cramps I ever had. I'm sure about 6 Motrin could have made me stop feeling them.
After an hour we determined that I was having regular 1 minute + contractions every 2 minutes.

You know what that means to me if you read my earlier birth story.


I was actually just a little put out because we had PLANNED to go to Crazy Buffet for dinner that night, sort of a last meal thing, but we opted for Sonny's BBQ instead. We rolled into Sonny's getting a table and I think the waiter was scared to death. I'm sitting there, puffing through contractions saying "More coke, please." And stuffing my face with BBQ, French Fries and texas toast. After I could eat no more I decided to call my doctor on the cell phone. It was THEN that I realized it was pretty low on battery. Oh well, I figured, I would use a pay phone.
But Sonny's had no pay phone! I went to the counter and asked the girl if I could use her phone (picture this, I'm puffing and somewhat bent over) and she says "Why?" and I said "Because I'm in labor and need to call my doctor." This sixteen year old wizkid says "I have to get my manager."
He comes out and of COURSE gives me the phone, looking terrified "Do you need anything? What can we do for you?" (translation - oh god get out of here fast!) My doctor called and said she'd meet me. This was Dr I. and I didn't know her so well, but had liked her the times I had met her.
When I got to the hospital they were in a tizzy. They already had had 3 sets of twins that day so they were FREAKING OUT. It was about 8:30 at night by the time I got there. I was dilated to 4! Yippee! The nurses couldn't find my chart, so I mentioned I was scheduled for a C Section. They found it over in surgical. The RN assigned to me in Triage asked me why I was doing a C section when my twins were vertex. And I totally started to cry. I told her how they wouldn't let me etc etc and she says "Let me talk to Dr I. She's really cool. Let me talk to her. And when you talk to her - TELL HER WHAT YOU WANT."
They were less than excited, though, to learn I had JUST eaten a full meal.
By the time Dr I showed up I was dilated to six but only uncomfortable, not miserable. She agreed, things were moving right along and that I could TRY to deliver vaginally.
In the labor and delivery room I had the king of Epidurals administer my epidural. I wish I knew his name I would write him a poem. Anyway, after that I was struck with a bout of itching that was incredible. The itching was like fire on my belly and I kept knocking the monitors off, pissing off my nurse.
The doctors told Scott it was going to be a while at around 11pm so he and Louis went home. My mom and I dozed off. At 12:30 AM it was ON. Scott and Louis raced back to the hospital and Scott arrived just as things were getting going in the operating room around 1am.

For those of you who don't know, if you try to deliver twins vaginally, they make you do it in the operating room, JUST IN CASE. They do a double set up. Surgical team to the left, OB team to the right. You have double the number of nurses ready. You have about 15 people all staring at you NAKED. It's charming. And you do it on an operating table. No fancy birthing table that is comfortable. A hard slab operating table.
The first thing I did was break the right stirrup. Broke it right off of the operating table. Put my foot right through it. This left this little tiny nurse to try to corral my right leg. Scott was on my left.
Miles was pretty easy. I pushed about 4 times and out he came. He was so little, I couldn't believe my eyes. I sobbed and sobbed "Oh god he's so little, does he have to go to the NICU?" and they all laughed "No no, he's BIG for a twin!" So then I calmed down and looked around. Labor had stopped. "What do we do now?" I asked. "We wait," the doctor said. "Wait for what?" "We wait for the labor to start back"
So we waited. And talked. The anesthesiologist informed the doctor that I ate a whole meal before coming in.......at which point, a wave of pain gripped me around the midsection and I projectile vomitted all over the surgical team. Who WERE, incidentally, scrubbed at that point.
"Ah," the anesthesologist says "There's that Sonny's!" and then three pushes later out came Charlie, who was even littler - but still "Big for a twin".
They were born at 1:14am and 1:26am respectively, and weighed 7 and 6 pounds.
The picture included is of me when contractions were 2 minutes apart and we were on our way to Sonny's.


Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

I feel sorry for the Sonny's people. They must have been freaked out.

You are a very brave laborer.

Becky said...

I only wish I could have smiled like that at ANY point during my labor.

What job would I not want to have? A projectile-vomit catcher in the OB OR. ;-)

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

Gabe and I can't figure out how you guys did it when you were that size.

Alison said...

Usually I read about two paragraphs of other people's birth stories and then my eyes start to glaze over. This is hilarious. I laughed out loud at least three times. I'm going to link to it from my blog too.

christa said...

that photo makes me hurt all over.

christa said...

in a purely physical way, i mean. you know i don't want no kids...

Running2Ks said...

Your belly is spectacular, and glorious!

What an incredible birth story. I am so glad things turned out so well, and what big babies!

LOL at "irritate the cervix I tell you"

Renee said...

What an awesome birth story!!! I loved every minute (that it took me to read it).

I am also so very happy that you had the twins vaginally...that so sucks that those docs think the only way for twins to be born is by c-section...well you showed them. Way to go! :D