A Mommy Blog About Raising Men, Not Boys.
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Friday, December 30, 2011

Christmas Doesn't Just Happen

There is this great episode of Family Guy where Lois goes off her rocker because Peter blew off getting more paper towel after she's slaved to make the holidays happen once again.
Christmas isn't easy. In a family of six it's an exercise in logistical expertise.
My husband would be the one who gets the nod for pulling it off. Getting the presents organized, watching the sales, doing 99.99999% of the wrapping. Making the big man's contributions appropriate, he does it all.

It never fails to amaze me, the WORK of Christmas. Somehow he always gets it all done, and manages to celebrate on Christmas day with us despite the few hours of sleep he ends up with.
He makes it magical, whether it's your 10th Christmas or your second. It's an amazing lot of work he puts into it and I don't tell him thank you enough.
I should also say thank you for eating the cookies and mile every year. This year was a peppermint overload. Sorry about that. :)
Thanks Hunny. It was great this year as always, because of you.

Christmas Doesn't Just Happen

There is this great episode of Family Guy where Lois goes off her rocker because Peter blew off getting more paper towel after she's slaved to make the holidays happen once again.
Christmas isn't easy. In a family of six it's an exercise in logistical expertise.
My husband would be the one who gets the nod for pulling it off. Getting the presents organized, watching the sales, doing 99.99999% of the wrapping. Making the big man's contributions appropriate, he does it all.

It never fails to amaze me, the WORK of Christmas. Somehow he always gets it all done, and manages to celebrate on Christmas day with us despite the few hours of sleep he ends up with.
He makes it magical, whether it's your 10th Christmas or your second. It's an amazing lot of work he puts into it and I don't tell him thank you enough.
I should also say thank you for eating the cookies and mile every year. This year was a peppermint overload. Sorry about that. :)
Thanks Hunny. It was great this year as always, because of you.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

We Might Watch Too Much TV

I'm not sure if we watch too much TV or not but last night the cable blinked out for a moment and while the cable box was rebooting, the TV was all blue screened out and the girl starts yelling.

"TEEEBEEE!!! OH NOOOO!"
"OOOHH NOO TEEEBEEE WHAT YOU DOING???"
"TEEBEE! OH NO NO NO TEEEE BEEEEE"
"TEEE BEEEE I WUV YOU!"

Teee beee, we wuv you.

More than Mrs Claus it would seem.

We Might Watch Too Much TV

I'm not sure if we watch too much TV or not but last night the cable blinked out for a moment and while the cable box was rebooting, the TV was all blue screened out and the girl starts yelling.

"TEEEBEEE!!! OH NOOOO!"
"OOOHH NOO TEEEBEEE WHAT YOU DOING???"
"TEEBEE! OH NO NO NO TEEEE BEEEEE"
"TEEE BEEEE I WUV YOU!"

Teee beee, we wuv you.

More than Mrs Claus it would seem.

Friday, December 16, 2011

9 Years Ago Today

I giggled all the way through the vows.
I had to wear a nightshirt on the drive to the chapel because my hair and veil was done - and nothing else I had brought with me didn't go over my head.
We ate dinner at the nicest restaurant in town, which also had a salad bar.
We couldn't get over the fact that something we hadn't thought would matter, would in fact make us feel so very different.

Happy Anniversary.

Thank you for asking.

9 Years Ago Today

I giggled all the way through the vows.
I had to wear a nightshirt on the drive to the chapel because my hair and veil was done - and nothing else I had brought with me didn't go over my head.
We ate dinner at the nicest restaurant in town, which also had a salad bar.
We couldn't get over the fact that something we hadn't thought would matter, would in fact make us feel so very different.

Happy Anniversary.

Thank you for asking.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

The New Santa Arrives


So we have this large collection of Santa's on our mantle. Every year we get a new Santa and it's kind of a fun thing, looking for the perfect NEW Santa to sit on the mantle with the others.
But our Santas have a dark past.

You see, they are in fact HOSTAGES from the past.

Once upon a time I had a friend who moved in and out of my house more than once. This friend was likeable and affable but not terrible responsible nor practical.
He once ate five pounds of cheese. Out of my refrigerator. That he did not pay for.
I mean, in GENERAL it wouldn't be a problem if someone over time ate all the cheese. If you live in my house I love you like family and you're welcome to eat my food.
But, it's sort of bizarre at best that you might not EXPECT especially after just having purchased said cheese.
But that's not the point. The last time he moved out and moved on to his new life adventure, he left behind a small collection of santas.
WHICH I NOW CALL MY OWN. AS PAYMENT FOR SAID CHEESE.
Yeah that's right. I KEPT THEM AS HOSTAGES.
They seem to like it here. They're happy living comfortably in boxes most of the year but they get to come out and be the decorative focal point (aside from the tree) of our Christmas living room.

No. You can't have them back. YOU MADE YOUR CHOICE CHEESE EATER!

(PS If you read this, I love you. Hope you are well.)

The New Santa Arrives


So we have this large collection of Santa's on our mantle. Every year we get a new Santa and it's kind of a fun thing, looking for the perfect NEW Santa to sit on the mantle with the others.
But our Santas have a dark past.

You see, they are in fact HOSTAGES from the past.

Once upon a time I had a friend who moved in and out of my house more than once. This friend was likeable and affable but not terrible responsible nor practical.
He once ate five pounds of cheese. Out of my refrigerator. That he did not pay for.
I mean, in GENERAL it wouldn't be a problem if someone over time ate all the cheese. If you live in my house I love you like family and you're welcome to eat my food.
But, it's sort of bizarre at best that you might not EXPECT especially after just having purchased said cheese.
But that's not the point. The last time he moved out and moved on to his new life adventure, he left behind a small collection of santas.
WHICH I NOW CALL MY OWN. AS PAYMENT FOR SAID CHEESE.
Yeah that's right. I KEPT THEM AS HOSTAGES.
They seem to like it here. They're happy living comfortably in boxes most of the year but they get to come out and be the decorative focal point (aside from the tree) of our Christmas living room.

No. You can't have them back. YOU MADE YOUR CHOICE CHEESE EATER!

(PS If you read this, I love you. Hope you are well.)

Friday, December 02, 2011

So I I Know I'm In My 40s But...

Ok I'm going to own up straight off the bat to liking a terrible song. 
I LIKE MOVES LIKE JAGGER from Maroon 5.
Ok seriously, it's a fluff piece and I'm not above being in love with some serious fluff in my life. I'll bawl like a baby during Steel Magnolias and Fried Green Tomatoes. So I get it. It's a dance tune supposed to be sexy and catchy and festive. It's all of those things. Except that it doesn't make any SENSE.
For a while I thought I had BINGO JED syndrome and was mishearing the lyrics. So I looked them up a couple of different places. I also looked up the Wiki on this song (WTF DOES EVERYTHING HAVE A WIKI?)
So then let's go through it because it starts off making sense.
Just shoot for the stars
If it feels right
And aim for my heart
If you feel like
And take me away and make it OK
I swear I'll behave

You wanted control
So we waited
I put on a show
Now I make it
You say I'm a kid
My ego is big
I don't give a shit
And it goes like this

So far it's ok right? I mean it's like hey girl I like you and I'm trying to impress you to get sexy times. 
Take me by the tongue
And I'll know you
Kiss me 'til you're drunk
And I'll show you

All the moves like Jagger
I've got the moves like Jagger
I've got the moves like Jagger

I don't need to try to control you
Look into my eyes and I'll own you

With them moves like Jagger
I've got the moves like Jagger
I've got the moves like Jagger


I gotta raise a slight eyebrow at this point because, the whole "take me by the tongue" thing, while meant to be sexy just gives me this image of Willie Wonka grabbing Veruka Salt by the tongue and saying "We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams." And see Gene Wilder isn't sexy and so now I'm in a not sexy place AT ALL with this song which is tragic because Adam Levine IS the sexy as seen HERE:
And Willie Wonka Gene Wilder is NOT as seen HERE:

So already I'm sideways on the sexy with this song. Plus, to me, Mick Jagger isn't really sexy. I didn't ever think he was sexy when he was younger and I really never found him to be a good dancer, if anything he's more like a creepy uncle trying to be sexy when he dances. So, at this point the entire POINT of the song is failing for me. 

But I love me some Adam Levine and a catchy tune so I plod onward.
Maybe it's hard
When you feel like you're broken and scarred
Nothing feels right
But when you're with me
I'll make you believe
That I've got the key

Oh
So get in the car
We can ride it
Wherever you want
Get inside it
And you want to steer
But I'm shifting gears
I'll take it from here (Oh! Yeah yeah!)
And it goes like this (Uh)


Ok so, now, is this a metaphor car? Because if it's a METAPHOR car then I guess she wanted to be on top but now he's going to be on top. That's my take away. Oh and she's got emotional issues from previous relationships and he's going to fix them with sexytimes (see above picture for verification).
Now Xtina Aguilara comes in (see how hip I am with the cool spelling) and she's got this big secret she's going to share with him.
You wanna know how to make me smile
Take control, own me just for the night
And if I share my secret
You're gonna have to keep it
Nobody else can see this

So watch and learn
I won't show you twice
Head to toe, oooh baby rub me right
But if I share my secret
You're gonna have to keep it
Nobody else can see this (Ay! Ay! Ay! Aaay!)


And it goes like this



Ok so first off, the Wiki says that this is supposed to be like a sort of flirtation dance that takes place in a club with a guy trying to impress a girl with his dance moves. Well, if that's the case, I'm not sure what sort of club it is because if this girl is showing him what I THINK she is showing him, well, that's just not very ladylike to do in public.

All that aside, I like this damned song.
And it goes like this........

So I I Know I'm In My 40s But...

Ok I'm going to own up straight off the bat to liking a terrible song. 
I LIKE MOVES LIKE JAGGER from Maroon 5.
Ok seriously, it's a fluff piece and I'm not above being in love with some serious fluff in my life. I'll bawl like a baby during Steel Magnolias and Fried Green Tomatoes. So I get it. It's a dance tune supposed to be sexy and catchy and festive. It's all of those things. Except that it doesn't make any SENSE.
For a while I thought I had BINGO JED syndrome and was mishearing the lyrics. So I looked them up a couple of different places. I also looked up the Wiki on this song (WTF DOES EVERYTHING HAVE A WIKI?)
So then let's go through it because it starts off making sense.
Just shoot for the stars
If it feels right
And aim for my heart
If you feel like
And take me away and make it OK
I swear I'll behave

You wanted control
So we waited
I put on a show
Now I make it
You say I'm a kid
My ego is big
I don't give a shit
And it goes like this

So far it's ok right? I mean it's like hey girl I like you and I'm trying to impress you to get sexy times. 
Take me by the tongue
And I'll know you
Kiss me 'til you're drunk
And I'll show you

All the moves like Jagger
I've got the moves like Jagger
I've got the moves like Jagger

I don't need to try to control you
Look into my eyes and I'll own you

With them moves like Jagger
I've got the moves like Jagger
I've got the moves like Jagger


I gotta raise a slight eyebrow at this point because, the whole "take me by the tongue" thing, while meant to be sexy just gives me this image of Willie Wonka grabbing Veruka Salt by the tongue and saying "We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams." And see Gene Wilder isn't sexy and so now I'm in a not sexy place AT ALL with this song which is tragic because Adam Levine IS the sexy as seen HERE:
And Willie Wonka Gene Wilder is NOT as seen HERE:

So already I'm sideways on the sexy with this song. Plus, to me, Mick Jagger isn't really sexy. I didn't ever think he was sexy when he was younger and I really never found him to be a good dancer, if anything he's more like a creepy uncle trying to be sexy when he dances. So, at this point the entire POINT of the song is failing for me. 

But I love me some Adam Levine and a catchy tune so I plod onward.
Maybe it's hard
When you feel like you're broken and scarred
Nothing feels right
But when you're with me
I'll make you believe
That I've got the key

Oh
So get in the car
We can ride it
Wherever you want
Get inside it
And you want to steer
But I'm shifting gears
I'll take it from here (Oh! Yeah yeah!)
And it goes like this (Uh)


Ok so, now, is this a metaphor car? Because if it's a METAPHOR car then I guess she wanted to be on top but now he's going to be on top. That's my take away. Oh and she's got emotional issues from previous relationships and he's going to fix them with sexytimes (see above picture for verification).
Now Xtina Aguilara comes in (see how hip I am with the cool spelling) and she's got this big secret she's going to share with him.
You wanna know how to make me smile
Take control, own me just for the night
And if I share my secret
You're gonna have to keep it
Nobody else can see this

So watch and learn
I won't show you twice
Head to toe, oooh baby rub me right
But if I share my secret
You're gonna have to keep it
Nobody else can see this (Ay! Ay! Ay! Aaay!)


And it goes like this



Ok so first off, the Wiki says that this is supposed to be like a sort of flirtation dance that takes place in a club with a guy trying to impress a girl with his dance moves. Well, if that's the case, I'm not sure what sort of club it is because if this girl is showing him what I THINK she is showing him, well, that's just not very ladylike to do in public.

All that aside, I like this damned song.
And it goes like this........

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

The Near Death Experience Of A Stranger

Imagine I am driving on the highway above. It's dark because it's after 6:30pm. It's also drizzly and cold and the traffic is a lot worse because it's rush hour leaving the Atlanta Metro.
I'm listening to the station that is playing Christmas tunes and singing along. In front of me is a big old tractor trailer that keeps sort of trailing over that right lane on the right. Just a foot or two over. Then he corrects. This goes on for a couple of miles so I am kind of keeping my eye on him.
The rain picks up a bit and the semi again slips to the right, the entire rig crossing the white line onto the shoulder and then suddenly makes a swerve so hard to the left that the trailer bounces.

Walking along the road is a hitchhiker. Exactly in the path along the shoulder where that semi was.

I SCREAMED.

For a split second I saw the cab plow into him and throw him under the wheels/to the side of the road/back at my van and then I realized he was fine. The truck driver had missed him. By what had to be inches.

He didn't even turn around. He kept his thumb up, his jacket blew as the trailer rushed past him and then me.

I nearly watched you die dude. I wonder if you even care.

The Near Death Experience Of A Stranger

Imagine I am driving on the highway above. It's dark because it's after 6:30pm. It's also drizzly and cold and the traffic is a lot worse because it's rush hour leaving the Atlanta Metro.
I'm listening to the station that is playing Christmas tunes and singing along. In front of me is a big old tractor trailer that keeps sort of trailing over that right lane on the right. Just a foot or two over. Then he corrects. This goes on for a couple of miles so I am kind of keeping my eye on him.
The rain picks up a bit and the semi again slips to the right, the entire rig crossing the white line onto the shoulder and then suddenly makes a swerve so hard to the left that the trailer bounces.

Walking along the road is a hitchhiker. Exactly in the path along the shoulder where that semi was.

I SCREAMED.

For a split second I saw the cab plow into him and throw him under the wheels/to the side of the road/back at my van and then I realized he was fine. The truck driver had missed him. By what had to be inches.

He didn't even turn around. He kept his thumb up, his jacket blew as the trailer rushed past him and then me.

I nearly watched you die dude. I wonder if you even care.

Monday, November 28, 2011

A Day For Trains

Several years of my childhood were spent in a house that was as legally close to a railroad track as could be.  The house shook and windows rattled every time the engines went blowing past the back of our house. I've often said that my brother's love of trains, and the reason he is an engineer now, is that his prenatal lullaby was the shaking and grumbling of Conrail.
My own boys love them though, so maybe it's just little boys who love trains. We went to the local rail museum to wander through cars in the middle of refurb and enjoy the blasts from the past, from days when rail travel was normal and not some exotic adventure.
The best part of this trip was probably when we walked into the shed and were surprised by who was working on the desk.
And some of our party were EXTREMELY excited to see him.
Trains are cool. Trains + Santa = UBER COOL.

A Day For Trains

Several years of my childhood were spent in a house that was as legally close to a railroad track as could be.  The house shook and windows rattled every time the engines went blowing past the back of our house. I've often said that my brother's love of trains, and the reason he is an engineer now, is that his prenatal lullaby was the shaking and grumbling of Conrail.
My own boys love them though, so maybe it's just little boys who love trains. We went to the local rail museum to wander through cars in the middle of refurb and enjoy the blasts from the past, from days when rail travel was normal and not some exotic adventure.
The best part of this trip was probably when we walked into the shed and were surprised by who was working on the desk.
And some of our party were EXTREMELY excited to see him.
Trains are cool. Trains + Santa = UBER COOL.

Sunday, November 27, 2011

There Are Feasts And There Are Feasts

My oldest son and I have been talking a lot about Thanksgiving this year. Probably because he's nine and because he never, ever stops talking. One of the things we've talked about is how much he likes our family traditions. We start out our day with a special breakfast that always includes a fun treat, like this year it was monkey bread.
And then while the big meal is cooking, during the day we have a lunch snack that is more like a feast of appetizer foods, cheese, sausages, sausage stars, treats of various sorts that are designed to snack and munch rather than be a formal meal. We eat this about the time most other people eat their "meal".
During most of the rest of the day, we just hang out. We watch movies, sometimes we play a game or two, but we spend the time TOGETHER. We watch the parades (Macy's and McDonald's) and spend our hours snuggling on the sofas and playing.
The boy asked me yesterday, as we were tooling around doing things, why would MOVIES come on out Thanksgiving and Christmas? Those are holidays, he informed me, why would people go to the movies on HOLIDAYS?
I told him that people get worn out being stuck with their families so they go out to the movies for something to do.
He was pretty puzzled by this but went on about his day. But he came back around later and said "I think we're lucky, because we like to spend time together, so we don't have to go to the movies we can be happy just being with our family. I think that's weird that people don't like their family."
Yeah, we are lucky.

There Are Feasts And There Are Feasts

My oldest son and I have been talking a lot about Thanksgiving this year. Probably because he's nine and because he never, ever stops talking. One of the things we've talked about is how much he likes our family traditions. We start out our day with a special breakfast that always includes a fun treat, like this year it was monkey bread.
And then while the big meal is cooking, during the day we have a lunch snack that is more like a feast of appetizer foods, cheese, sausages, sausage stars, treats of various sorts that are designed to snack and munch rather than be a formal meal. We eat this about the time most other people eat their "meal".
During most of the rest of the day, we just hang out. We watch movies, sometimes we play a game or two, but we spend the time TOGETHER. We watch the parades (Macy's and McDonald's) and spend our hours snuggling on the sofas and playing.
The boy asked me yesterday, as we were tooling around doing things, why would MOVIES come on out Thanksgiving and Christmas? Those are holidays, he informed me, why would people go to the movies on HOLIDAYS?
I told him that people get worn out being stuck with their families so they go out to the movies for something to do.
He was pretty puzzled by this but went on about his day. But he came back around later and said "I think we're lucky, because we like to spend time together, so we don't have to go to the movies we can be happy just being with our family. I think that's weird that people don't like their family."
Yeah, we are lucky.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

I Was Denied Both Indians AND Pilgrims

So we went to the oldest boy's school for the traditional Thanksgiving lunch (served properly one week BEFORE Thanksgiving on Thursday). I kind of like this, because, we go and eat in the cafeteria with the kids and we get to go through the line with all the kids and get food.
It's cool to see how they do it now - different from when we were in school. These new fangled educators do a thing called "OFFERED" vs. "SERVE". They put food out on a cafeteria style line and the kids select what they want. One entree, two sides, etc etc.
Back in my day, they slopped food on your plate AND YOU WERE GRATEFUL.
Ok that's totally a lie you weren't, you just simply threw away that crap you didn't want. So that makes this way much better.
I love that part of it, and I love seeing the kids performing on the piano, all the artwork in the hallways, and especially all the kindergartners and first graders dressed up like Indians and Pilgrums. Little paper hats and headresses, paying homage to the first Thanksgiving where we told the American Indians THANK YOU FOR HELPING US STAY ALIVE OH HEY WE'RE GOING TO NEED ALL THIS LAND.
Except for THIS year.
THERE WERE NO PILGRIMS OR INDIANS!



This annoyed the crap out of me. Where were my Indians? Where were my Pilgrims?
Have we gotten so PC we can't be American Indians who really WERE at the Thanksgiving and we really WERE glad for them to be at that meal? If that's the case - THEN WHERE WERE MY PILGRMS??
Surely there is no white guilt in dressing up like Pilgrims? Or maybe were the Pilgrims t0o religious? I'd say it's separation of church and state run amok but I live in the bible belt and so that's not it.
I'm chalking it up to lazy teachers and or no budget for glue and construction paper. Which is a crime because it's epic cute and ridiculously fun.

However, the very best part of the entire lunch is the part the big boy looks forward to the most.
Showing off his baby.

He wheels her around, up and down the aisles, making sure all the kids get to see her. He skipped ICE CREAM to make sure he had enough time.

Watching him push her around, I'm pretty sure I know what he's thankful for.

I Was Denied Both Indians AND Pilgrims

So we went to the oldest boy's school for the traditional Thanksgiving lunch (served properly one week BEFORE Thanksgiving on Thursday). I kind of like this, because, we go and eat in the cafeteria with the kids and we get to go through the line with all the kids and get food.
It's cool to see how they do it now - different from when we were in school. These new fangled educators do a thing called "OFFERED" vs. "SERVE". They put food out on a cafeteria style line and the kids select what they want. One entree, two sides, etc etc.
Back in my day, they slopped food on your plate AND YOU WERE GRATEFUL.
Ok that's totally a lie you weren't, you just simply threw away that crap you didn't want. So that makes this way much better.
I love that part of it, and I love seeing the kids performing on the piano, all the artwork in the hallways, and especially all the kindergartners and first graders dressed up like Indians and Pilgrums. Little paper hats and headresses, paying homage to the first Thanksgiving where we told the American Indians THANK YOU FOR HELPING US STAY ALIVE OH HEY WE'RE GOING TO NEED ALL THIS LAND.
Except for THIS year.
THERE WERE NO PILGRIMS OR INDIANS!



This annoyed the crap out of me. Where were my Indians? Where were my Pilgrims?
Have we gotten so PC we can't be American Indians who really WERE at the Thanksgiving and we really WERE glad for them to be at that meal? If that's the case - THEN WHERE WERE MY PILGRMS??
Surely there is no white guilt in dressing up like Pilgrims? Or maybe were the Pilgrims t0o religious? I'd say it's separation of church and state run amok but I live in the bible belt and so that's not it.
I'm chalking it up to lazy teachers and or no budget for glue and construction paper. Which is a crime because it's epic cute and ridiculously fun.

However, the very best part of the entire lunch is the part the big boy looks forward to the most.
Showing off his baby.

He wheels her around, up and down the aisles, making sure all the kids get to see her. He skipped ICE CREAM to make sure he had enough time.

Watching him push her around, I'm pretty sure I know what he's thankful for.