Can't You See That They're Amazing

We're having trouble with Miles again on the bus. It's been going on for a while, and we're trying a behavior reward system thing that we did last year with some success. Get a drink of coke before you get on the bus, with lots of "NO SPITTING! NO SCREAMING! NO SPITTING AND BE GOOD!" and then I tell him he'll get MORE Coke at school if he is good.

It worked last year after a few days. This year? Not so much. Today he was screaming and carrying on before the door even closed. They told me this morning that they put another child in the seat beside him, and he screamed at the child and spit at him and it was a whole scene.

Why does he do this? I'd love to know. The child who loves books, and Teletubbies, and watching videos about ABCs, trains, and other things also will run across the room and attack Charlie for no reason. He goes crazy at school and throws insane tantrums.

Where is my Anne Sullivan?

He also loves school. The very school bus he throws these tantrums on, he is ECSTATIC when it arrives. I don't know what the disconnect is. I don't know why he would smiled and clap and say "School bus! GO!" and hug me so JOYFULLY, and then rave like a lunatic ON THE BUS.

Except for - Autism.

Miles and Charlie are two little boys who don't communicate properly. They UNDERSTAND every single word you say to them, however. They like to play, and they love to snuggle. This is a pic from about 20 minutes ago of us all three cuddling and loving on each other in the bed. "I want tickles!" "I want hugs!" "I want snuggled" they say and we giggle and roll around playing.

They're wonderful. They're a challenge. They're a nightmare. They're my babies.

I made them physically perfect. They're good looking. They have great motor skills. They laugh and are funny.

But their brains, well, their brains aren't right. And I can't fix them and no one can.

I laid in bed and cried with them both in my arms, because today Miles bus driver has decided that she's going to contact her supervisor about putting "a shield" on him because he'll spit. It's not like hocking loogies or anything but yeah I get it, it's gross.

A shield - think Hannibal Lector. They want to force him to travel on a bus where he is already in a harness, also in a face shield. Like he isn't a human.

If you think they're going to put a shield on my child's face, we haven't met.

Looks like my morning schedule will be altering to fit another car rider in my life. I'm not sure how they'll do this - his parapro will have to meet him I guess in the line or I walk him in, I have no idea what they do with special needs.

I'm just angry and frustrated. The bit of spitting he's done wipes up with some Lysol. Don't sit other people with him, strap him into his seat AND IGNORE HIM. How hard is that? I GET IT HE IS ANNOYING. But good grief you are driving a bus full of special needs kids, don't they all do nutty stuff that is annoying?

This is just me venting. I'll drive him to school. they can suck it with their shield. That's my child. He's not an animal. You're not going to dehumanize him and make him lesser like that. He already walks through the school wearing a HARNESS.

Well, now he won't even have to wear that.



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