A Mommy Blog About Raising Men, Not Boys.
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Monday, November 19, 2012

Tell Him About The Twinkie

So I sit here with my Hostess coffee cakes and my mind is on bakeries and traditions. I'm kinda bummed that Hostess is going out of business, because it's an institution, because it's a tradition, because despite Twinkies being gross they are also good.
It's just kind of a shame to me though. Like Kool-Aid, they're a childhood THING. Sugar filled calories that have no purpose other than to be fun for little kids.
Of course, we're probably to blame as much as anyone for Hostess not staying afloat. It's one thing to say "OMG HOSTESS! LOVE THEM" and it's another thing to actually patronize them.
If I loved them SO much, why were there no Hostess products in my cabinet until they announced they were shuttering their business?
There weren't any because first of all - there was no urgency, who woulda thunk it? Secondly, they were MORE EXPENSIVE. In a family of four kids, I'm afraid Little Debbie reigns supreme in terms of cheap bakery goods value. It's not BETTER not by any means, but you know, it was cheaper and "good enough" so Little Debbie made it into the cart more often than not.

I'm glad though, that we were able to take one last stroll through the treats from Hostess, just in case no one buys them and brings the company back to life. It's kind of nice, it's a fun family thing to do together, even if it's a bit silly.

I had moved away when the elegant bakery of my childhood ROSELYN went out of business, and never got another chance to sample it's wares. It turns out it was probably just as well as they were closed down for their bakeries having rat infested filth throughout - ick, but you'd never have known it from the shops themselves. Ladies in blue dresses and white aprons waited on you and the baked goods all sat on beautiful white paper doilies behind immaculate glass cases. Apparently they failed their board of health review quite horribly, people quit eating there (gee wonder why) and then they failed it again if memory serves.

But even knowing what disgusting holes their actual bakeries were, I always regret a little that I'll never have another alligator cake, or napoleon, or anything else from them

So I'm happy to take this stroll down memory lane with Hostess.

But part of me wants to keep a Twinkie for ten years, to see if Egon is right.


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