It Looks Like Home To Me Alright

I pause in my self absorbed, grief stricken wailing to bring you...muffins.

I take off tomorrow to a place that according to Weather.com will be both cold and rainy. I'm gonna be away from my loves for three days - well three nights, not returning until Thursday around dinner time. I felt like I had to make my last day at home a good one, a FUN one.

They're only Martha White "just add milk" cheapie muffins. They aren't amazing and fresh fruit doesn't burst from them as you take bites. But as they bake the fill the house with amazing good smells. I had crept down the stairs while Louis played some Star Wars game and Miles watched YOUTUBE, and mixed them up. About the time I was ready to take them out of the oven a parade of humans came down the stairs "What's that smell? Are you BAKING!?" they all filed into the kitchen.

That's right, I stirred in milk and baked for you. Behold my domestic prowess.

It was the official start of football and with mom about to step away for most of the week we sent dad packing to go watch the Colts get their asses handed to them.

We on the other hand decided to renew our tradition of heading out for a picnic on Daddy's Day Off.

We filled our picnic basket with lunchy items and treats and headed to the nature center. The area where we like to picnic was FULL of people doing the zipline courses so we headed over to the watershed area and found some shade.

We had stopped by the candy shop before we got there and everyone got to choose one special treat for today.

After that it was time to do some exploring even though it's a path we know pretty well.

The nature center by us has a watershed and a water reclamation path you can walk and see how they use the water for the plants, the toilets, everything that isn't the bit where humans touch it. It's pretty interesting.

We followed the path, my four children chattering nonstop about everything and nothing along the way.

I had this great talk yesterday with one of my oldest friends. She lost her mom six years ago, and walked a similar but I think even worse path with her own mom, one of terminal illness and the hell that comes with it for the patient as well as the survivors. We're both strong will girls from moms who believed we could do anything, be anything, and never let us think otherwise. I think we're also girls who never conceived of a world without our moms.

She knows what I'm feeling. She's been there, done that. Thank god there isn't a tee shirt.

She and I took different paths in our lives, but both of stayed true to who we were and are. I look at her with so much admiration for all she's survived and managed to prosper through. She's a credit to her mom who I know was so proud of her - and would be more so every day were she still here. Our conversation gave me hope, and it gave me strength I forgot I had.

So I had this day today where I didn't cry, but I put my energy and time into my little pieces of my own mother's immortality. Her smile, her silly sense of humor, her creativity, her love of coffee, all the things that came down through my 23 chromosomes that now lives in my four children - those things got my energy today. It felt good to see her all day long in little things and little places.

I realize my love of this farmhouse is just another piece of my mother. After all, that's a just a saltbox with a porch on it - amirite? My mother always wanted a saltbox house.

I am.

Today's been a good day. Next up - time to make some pizza and spend time together before we all get ready for bed.

Tomorrow I fly north into what appears to be cold and rain.

Perfect.
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